ALLOW

Sometimes it’s about the lines you draw around yourself. Sometimes it’s about watching someone else draw lines around you. But it’s always about stepping over these lines despite your bpm might be well over 150 and allowing yourself to try something new, to go somewhere else. Allowing yourself to “not know” before you do. Allowing things to happen as you go and trusting that it’s all done the best way tailored exactly for you. To release the need to control any outcome. To believe. Control needs less faith than allowing. That’s why you see rules everywhere. But we don’t need them when it comes to personal accomplishments, there are things that don’t quite fall in the span of our power. Feeling that you should control something is just a source of stress which is known for making outcomes worse than better.

If you look closer, there are some lines, tiny ones that will first seem very harmless. Pay special attention to them as they could be the ones appearing inconspicuous but making your world a self-sabotage paradise. Examples? “You’re never enough. There’s already too many people that do what you’re thinking of doing. What would you do in a country where you can’t even speak their language? We’re not millionaires. Stop running. Stop dancing. Calm down. Stop laughing. You’re too dark. You’re too big, too small, it’s better when you don’t risk anything.….” All these lines that could have been said to you were automatically drawn around you. If you don’t acknowledge them, and don’t acknowledge the way it made you feel, they can be managing your decisions, behaviour, self talk - without you realising it. Some lines are just li(n)es. What’s an awesome thing tho? All it takes is to notice them and you’re already halfway on your path of crossing them.There’s so many of them. Some lines could be well embedded from your childhood. Certain lines seemed to be quite normal. But as you see the world from different angles, you realise it was something disordered. Lines that feel rather like a wall than just drawing on the floor. Lines that feel shameful to cross. Lines that will make certain people sad or disappointed if you cross them. But you will never satisfy the whole audience by your next step and you’ll always let down someone. So make sure you’re letting down the “right” people. Why to cross these lines if I let down someone, feel uncomfortable or scared? That’s a fantastic question. We’re going back to the one and only sentence - By every choice you say “no” to other potential choices. You can make the choice of stepping over your lines and in short term feel the uncomfortable state you’re in, or you can stay the same and feel uncomfortable longterm as you stay on one place. You choose. And if you make the choice of going further, you need to allow anything to come and go with it. And that’s why the decision of allowing is so powerful. You will feel all these emotions, but you no longer hold any tension and needed outcome about it. You just allow everything come and go.You allow outcome that should happen, happen.

And this process requires a great belief and trust in your own self. How would you feel about your friend that you borrow your car? Let’s suppose this car has a great value to you. You might feel a slight tension, be scared about borrowing it to anyone but you trust your friend so much that you let him use something so valuable like your car. You can’t have the need to control anything. You would just let your friend know that you don’t really trust them. The same approach is required for your inner trust when going to unknown places. You can’t afford to have doubts about any step you’re making. You either go there or fix your beliefs and only then go ahead. You can be scared, but you can’t lack the trust and faith. Like with that friend, you let yourself go to the driver’s seat, trusting you’ll end up on a better place. You let yourself go over these lines with no direction anymore, for a while, into pure nothingness. And that “while” feels very uncomfortable, you might loose some friends, get nothing like “compensation”, but this doesn’t make you go back, because you trust your own self and where you’re going even though you have probably no idea whether it’s the right direction and how it will end up. You don’t know what kind of problems will arise but you trust yourself you’ll solve them always. And like this you find yourself in new situations, new environments, facing new challenges and new circle of people that you wouldn’t find if you haven’t allowed yourself to step over these lines.

If this feels like an idea you can’t grasp yet, imagine staying in the same country your whole life, because someone in your childhood once said that “this is the right way and the outside world is just too unpredictable. Here we’re good. Safe.” and by saying it the person has automatically drawn a line around you, in case of country on the map, literally. And you might not realise this, but you go about your life and make desicions that make you stay in your country. But what if you took that job in UK and literally “crossed the line”? What would happen next? You would feel lonely, you would automatically let down some people by leaving, you would feel very unconformtable and lonely at first. But after a while, with no other choice, you would need to start socialize and meet circle of people, just like that, you would create a network of new people some of which could change your life, you never know. You would be introduced to new ideas, new ways of living and you would find there new “you” because in situations where you don’t have a choice but to find a solution you develop your confidence, and therefore the trust in you gets greater. Like this it gets easier to allow yourself to cross more lines and it all creates this beautiful snowball effect. That’s why lots of people from different countries are suddenly successful when they move in to another country. It’s those moments of “I don’t have any other choice than to make this sh.. work” when they find their real potential.

And this doesn’t apply to turning your whole life around and moving out to another country. This applies to anything that just doesn’t feel quite right to you. You want to speak up in front of your boss even tho everyone says he would fire you for that? You might be surprised how he would respond if you use kind and respectful tone. There’s nothing like getting a constructive feedback from a respectful employee, maybe there just hasn’t been a person that could show him the respect he requires. You want to decline your invitation to a family gathering that “everyone needs to be part of” and go on a dinner with your date? Allow yourself to do these things that feel like “HELL YES” and decline stuff that feel like “meh” and try to be deaf and blind to anyone that has problem with it. Because no one sees things like you do. And you don’t see things like they do. So respect them, but protect your peace and passions. Allow yourself to be seen as you try new things because you never know who could be inspired by you, those who understand what it’s like to try, won’t laugh and those who do nothing can laugh their a.. off. Allow yourself to be bad first in thing that feels like it’s something you could put you whole life in it. Allow yourself to be disliked because only after you know you’ve done something disruptive. Allow and let go. Things that are right for you, will come to you. Things that don’t belong to you will leave. And it’s all alright.

Take care ❤️

FAMILIARTIY

You feel it on places where you know you’ll find the cup for your tea, your old books, your old notes, photos. It is the feeling of total safety and comfort. It doesn’t have to be a physical space though. It is the dialect you hear. Your native language when you are in the middle of different country. It reminds you of your childhood when there was so many things unknown to you and your world was so small and everything had its place. Even if you experienced danger or abuse as a child, you feel weirdly comfortable with it, because it reminds you of your childhood and quite strangely your brain craves it. Brain craves anything that would strip it of unnecessary analyzing caused by uncertainty - simply stuff you haven’t experienced yet. It’s the pure nature of brain and our instincts. Brain seeks comfort, safety, faces we know, our parents. You remember how great, calm, you feel when you come to your city where you were born or if you don’t have good memories from the city you were born, think of a place from your childhood that you felt so good, so welcomed, maybe it was your friend’s house, maybe it was at your grandma’s, maybe it was a specific place of a vacation you remember so clearly; maybe it isn’t a place but a certain language - when you hear it, you think of the times when you were with less responsabilities, it gives you the sense of nostalgia. The feeling of „finally I can let go now“.

It’s good to be reminded of these feelings, places, people, sounds. But, paradoxically, it starts to be dangerous (for your success) if you indulge in this feeling for too long and you get attached to certain people, places or feelings. Being attached emotionally to anything so much it makes very hard to leave or it makes you even stay forever, that is a killer of your potential. This familiarity, no matter how great, calming, serene, safe it feels could be damaging. We don’t choose where we are born but we can choose where we spend our last days. I wish for everyone let it not be the same place that you were born in, if you feel that your potential is not realised there. It hurts to leave, to not hug your loved ones for a long time, to feel alone lot of times. But doesn’t it hurt to know you could go somewhere, try something new, try the possibilities of life and not actually doing it? The question of what it would be like are in your head for a reason. When you grow up in a certain place, there are certain faces with certain experiences, and based on these experiences they advice you on your life. And you have to listen…otherwise you wouldn’t “survive”. Then you have certain “name”, you might be known for something (like being the best in language classes or the worst in math or a dancer or painter, writer, whatever) and no matter how much you wanna fight against these „labels“, by constant repeating, your subconscious mind grabs something. And believe it or not, this might greatly influence the whole perception of yourself. Perception that others gave you. And if you stay in this space, you might really become it. And once you become others’ idea, you’re living for someone else. Also you can feel certain expectations projected on you and if you are a person who is measuring his worth on the things you produce, your marks, your diplomas, you are in a trap.

But realise, this is only one little bubble you experience in this whole world. Can you imagine how many different realities are out there? Can you imagine what advices, what feedback others would give you in different parts of the world? What kind of approach they have somewhere else that you could find inspiring? And can you imagine a new circle of people that have no expectations of you? In situations like this, there is another version that will add on to the “complete you”. That will show you your more and more authentic self, just like a new child born in this world, you are a new person in new environment. This is the magic of travelling. Unfamiliarity, uncenrtainty, taking risks, calculated, not calculated, living as rich life as you possibly can. Will the feeling of familiarity and safety win and will you be okay with the question „What if I actually did that“? You choose. But choose wisely.

At the end, the greatest risk of success is taking no risk.

Take care ❤️

GOAL

Definition of goal is according to Oxford Dictionary “the object of a person's ambition or effort; an aim or desired result.”

Things we plan to accomplish. Sounds quite fair…

…and boring.

First they probably thought goals you’re presenting to your team at kick-off meeting. Or stuff like get your salary raised, lose weight, read 10 books. Here, we’re talking goals that aren’t matter of one week or one month…Not even that would take one year. We’re talking about something that takes you decade(s). We are talking about a specific goal that you want, however that seems impossible to accomplish (for now) - we are talking about goal that takes a good amount of imagination, madness and delusion to even take them into consideration. Do you have something like that? If you don’t, no need to continue reading. First go find this thing that feels like taking off in spaceship, feels frightening and impossible to reach, but you feel such a desire towards that. Then read the rest.

Got it? Nice:)

You need to have this vision that is specific, otherwise you would be like a tourist with a beautiful map with silver lining but everything in it would be blurred as hell. Where would such a beautiful but unclear map lead you? Frustration? Confusion? You would try your “luck” to go the way you “feel” like going but baby this is not enough. However, if a tourist has a map with specific goals and direction, he’s able to see the distance he already managed to cover. That makes him organised and gives him clear idea of how far he’s able to go each day so that one day he’ll be in the final destination. But how can we get to the final destination when it’s impossible?

Is it impossible? Or it seems impossible?

Now, we’re not talking corporate goals that have a specific policies and budget. Here we talk about you, you are the company, so you might as well make your own rules. For humans, these rules of what’s feasible or not are called beliefs. And what if your goal still feels impossible to you but you keep dreaming about it? If this happened in company, we would need to change the goal so that it meets the rules. In life, we change beliefs so that they meet the goal. If this goal of yours still feels like as if you weren’t able to go towards it or touch it, give yourself the chance, allow yourself to change your beliefs and skyrocket them to the heights. If something is possible, it’s change.

How? Walk. Go far far away. Alone. No Phone. Just you, yourself overseen by you, your majesty. And if you need, leave for a while. Like a month. Two… From everything that’s familiar to you. Is it too extreme? okay. But keep in mind, you can’t expect big results by doing small moves, small sarcrifices - “I’ll think about it throughout the weekend” - is just not enough. You need to show to your goal how important it is for you. For example - want to become a dancer but you happen to be a dentist? Okay, first of all shorten your working hours so that you have daily 3 hours extra for your practice - in one year, your dance skills would be unrecognizable. Wait - but to cut daily 3 hours? That means I get 30 % lower salary? Yes, so you really want it or this is already a problem?…They are laughing at you? Be deaf to them. Changes are always messy and confusing and you doubt the whole process, but do we doubt trees when all leaves become so brown and fall out during autumn? The leaves are everywhere, there’s ton of mud everywhere but we already know it’s a sign of change that will lead to fruit. So don’t expect your change to be clean neat and perfect, it’s never like that. And people that don’t have the courage to really listen to themselves can do nothing but laugh at others, they are showing you their envy because you had the courage and they didn’t - that’s it. Don’t overthink them - no - don’t EVER think of them. Or are you working at warehouse and wanting to become a millionaire? Rent cheaper location so that you can buy more books and attend to workshops or go to school. Having a child? Sarcrificing 4 hours of time with your child and sarcrificing the money to pay a nanny in order to focus on your little business is worth everything if you realize this investment could lead towards full freedom. Isn’t it worth the try? Once you believe, you’ll be given opportunities and you’re halfway there. It makes me sad when someone has such amazing aspirations and ideas but isn’t following them just because his beliefs are just too small that the dream simply doesn’t fit in it.

Alright - so you have the map that’s showing you where you’re heading, you know how many miles you’ve already covered and you believe. This is really solid base for success, but to keep yourself on track, you need a discipline. To have a discipline, you need the reason. Your WHY - and a strong one. Strong like a diamond. It needs to talk your deepest values (if you’re not sure about them go back to walking alone, you might seem to be alone, but it’s that time when the whole space works with you, for you, to give you ideas, feelings). The whole goal should feel like the one thing that you would do for free, it’s so aligned with you that the reward goes just by doing your thing. Money is just something “extra”. You need to love your goal. You need to be proud of it and it needs to be so worth that you would sarcrifice a great part of your life to attain it. It needs to mean a lot to you. It needs to feel as important as raising your child. What you’re doing actually, you are creating something that would have such a big influence that you would create a long lasting traces of you - Shakespeare is dead, but not in theaters. Michael Jackson isn’t here anymore, but will be in radio for more decades to come. Your children are doing the same. When you won’t be here anymore, they will represent a part of you. And this is called legacy. That’s why it’s as important as raising a child. Last thing? Realise that the only deadline that’s truly truly important is your deadline. We all spent our time working for someone else and some of us still do and some of us will be always working for someone else. Everything is excellent choice if you really want it. But don’t live just by your work. Do more things. Throw away TV. It’s wasting your time, stealing your creativity. Limit largely your sources of news, it makes you anxious. Stay informed! But have a limit. Do something that has deeper meaning on the side. Maybe one day you could afford to do just that. And don’t set your goals to accomplish them. Set them to question you, to show you what you’re capable of. To push the evelope fearlessly with conviction. This page of book “Staying Strong” by Demi Lovato (yes she has a book) is pinned on my wall in front of my face when I sit down behind my working desk. And by reading it everyday it almost raised me. I encourage you to save this, print it and do the same. The reading time is 30 seconds per day and it has impact on your whole future. This is the power of subconscious mind.

I highly recommend reading this whole book - you can buy it here.

We live very short lifes when you compare it with the age of space for example. Stop having small goals. Challenge this life, what it has in store for you. And spoiler: It has exactly what you believe it has. Don’t serve life, make it serve you.

Btw. I used SMART goals framework for this text (can only recommend for setting goals) - it’s mainly for projects but aren’t you the most important project we’re talking about here?

DESERVE

What do you want?

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And do you think believe, that you deserve that?

You might have one thing that you wanted to do for a long time. This thing keeps calling you for so long that you could have been just a child when it first appeared. And until now you get so excited when you just put a great music in your ears, lay down on your bed, close your eyes and dream about it. You might feel all the little details in this imagination, that’s how much your authentic self wants it. Yet once this dreaming session stops, you aren’t thinking about it anymore. Your conscious mind wouldn’t let you think about it. It feels maybe too great for it to be real in your life. Why? Our conscious mind is shaped by the external world around you. Our conscious mind is very selective in what to believe or not. And since it’s making its’ own remix of experiences & information from early childhood, surroundings that we currently find ourselves in, it is inevitable we are thinking just as people we hang out the most with. We usually don’t think about stuff such as “how to start flying as individuals”, because even tho it would be absolutely spectacular, in our minds it’s such an unattainable type of goal that dealing with it would only distract us from our daily tasks “that are the only and most important” such as going to work, getting through all the necessary small talks that always show you how doing plank isn’t the only activity where one minute feels like an hour.

“Well but isn’t it enough? This is life. No? That’s it, right? At least what I heard…but I don’t know truly…It’s my first time living…”

No. It’s nothing but what your closest people around you believe, or believed when you were a child. Here’s the thing - everyone is soaking up the beliefs of previous generation - of our parents, teachers, doctors, acquaintances. And it’s all very natural, but as natural it is, so it is necessary to do the work and recognize this fact. Consequently, belief system of our parents is shaped by our grandparents and the time they lived in. It was time of uncertainty and fear, so don’t get them wrong for shaping you the way they did. They just didn’t realise this fact. But you can. They did all they could for you to be safe, because it was their value #1 (usually). If there was a better way how to do it, they would definetly choose to go that way. However, this fact means that great chunk of people have probably very humble and small minded belief system. As children we are so attentive. We listen to conversations of others, how they talk with loved ones, how they talk about strangers, about themselves. These people are our role models - otherwise we wouldn’t survive.

Now keep in mind that the only bad type of life is the one others choose for you. If you’re truly happy with your life now, we’re happy for you.

However, If you realise you’re somewhere or doing something just to live up to expectations of someone else, you’re living for someone else. And even tho you already know all of this about your life, and you also know damn well the reality in which you would be so much happier, there’s something stopping you. It’s your belief system. And remember that the way you end up in your work, in your relationships, in basic random daily situations (asking for more coffee, asking whether you can get different colour of that dress, or saying that the meal wasn’t spectacular as they said it would be) always comes down to the belief systems you have carried from your childhood. Your life is direct reflection of you and of what you believe you deserve.

Here comes the hard part - you need to be extremely honest in what you believe, what others made you believe, about your closest people, about the way you grew up, about all the fears that has been embeded in you. If you were silenced or stopped from doing something you wanted to do very naturally, pay close attention to it. This could have been your intuition saying ”hey if you follow this tendency you’ll live your purpose but this is the only way how I can remind you about this fact” and in the meantime you were listening to your family to go to college, become a lawyer, doctor, something stable. But how could you not listen to your family, right? They want the best for you and you see they live fair lifes…And the voice? That intuition or whatever? No one knows what it is…In addition! No one from my circle has done anything similar to what I dream to do, it’s dumb and I am thinking too high.

Who do I think I am? A God?”

In fact, you are. There is a piece of God/Universe/Higher power in each one of us. We are here, but before, we were a non-living matter. From nothing there was created life. We got alive from something that didn’t have life in it before. We are building cities and are sending rockets to the space and you are here thinking you should listen to people who isn’t in the situation where you want to be. It’s time to wake up. And If you’re reading until now, you know damn well it is. No one has spare life to use. Even cats don’t have more lives to live. You need to safe your belief system in order to safe yourself. Does it sound dramatic to you? To those who really want to seize the life absolutely know that it’s not. Shut your ego and let yourself be really yourself. And think of yourself what you want. There’s no one to please. People will be never pleased and if they are they’re quick to forget. Let yourself forget first and listen to yourself before you make any decision. Any decision based on YOUR belief system, on what YOU believe you deserve, on what YOU know you can make. To get to this point you need a lot of alone time. There’s no magic pill, only magic is the time capsule where you’re only with yourself. If you think you can do this “meanwhile” hanging out with others, you don’t want it enough. The goal is to have no other “influences” than you, yourself and your majesty. First thing is to feel the desire or almost “the need” to know what you’re here for. Then you need to be ready for an extreme rollercoaster of emotions and confusion that lead to a place that we’re talking about - the place of real you, your own city where you set the rules and where you are brave enough to ask for things others wouldn’t even dare. Because they stayed with the belief of generation before us that just thinks differently.

Remember what you want wants you and it already exists, otherwise you wouldn’t be aware of it. When your mom was making your favourite meal, you knew it without seeing it. You recognized it by the smell. Here, the “smell” is the wanting.

Take care, M.

CHANGE

Because it is the only thing that is inevitable and guaranteed. Guaranteed like nothing else in this world.

Because we shouldn’t avoid it - on the contrary - let’s welcome it with excitement and hope. Hope for better days, for better us.

How you were yesterday will never repeat again. How you will be tomorrow will show up only those 24 hours. There is never a same moment twice. There is never the identical person same two days in a row even tho, his birth certificate nubmer is still the same. Change is the only constant in our lives, yet we are so avoidant to it. Why?

As a very self conscious child with hyper-focus on others’ subtle changes in their face expressions that would signal negative emotions, I tended to avoid all conversations about myself and my worth, therefore also about the fact if I changed - because I believed that the sentence “You changed” was never a compliment. This sentence always felt like an obligation to start my Powerpoint Presentation on the topic “10 reasons why I changed”. It felt like moment that required explanation. It was always about the perception of others - what they think about me. So I thought. In the actual fact it was “What I think they think about me”. With time, observing myself, my loved ones, acquaintances, I realised that If it was me, who is telling others “You changed” - only thing i got from this kind of thinking was

• doubts, because you automatically start to compare yourself to others if you think about them in a way that isn’t loving,

• you loose focus from yourself, because you are being distracted by other person that has usually nothing to do with your own life, and at the end of all this?

• You just wasted time.

And then I realised. All these people with comments on you “Oh you changed.”, “I thought you were going to be this and that” they are really just robbing themselves. They needed to take their time to analyse you. Giving YOU their attention. Instead they could put this “investigation” somewhere on more productive place. Now don’t confuse this type of thought process with honest wishing the best for someone. Celebrating others - that’s something everyone should do with knowing the same will come back to him.

Let’s develop the “need to explain” part, that is for most really daunting.

The art of hearing out someone saying how you changed, looking them in the eyes, smiling and just moving on, minding your own business with no thought residue of their opinion, is a skill that can be acquired. Who will teach us? Let’s look at someone that has never said a word. Still, after a time, everyone suddenly understood what’s going on and she (it’s her I’m convinced) is one of the most respected things on this planet.

Nature. Constant changes, no explanations. There is something beautiful about doing your own thing and not explaining yourself. The reason we sometimes avoid it is lack of faith. Because change means unknown, uncertainty, new field. We hate not knowing. Those who lack faith will never get to the point of dealing or rather “easing in” into the uncertainty. But as elevated value faith is, such elevated results can be expected. If you believe enough.

So do your own thing and take some risks. You’re here for a very short period of time even tho it might not feel like it right now. Know right the rules. Those who understand that change has to be embraced, not dimmed will have the world on the silver plate. Those who don’t are making the plates for you. It might sound harsh but that’s the world. Still, give everyone chance to understand this. Stay open, everyone deserves chance to change. And if you notice someone changing, show support, they might need it. And to those who won’t change, the only presentation you might deliver now is “Why I change and why you should not care”- and make it in Keynote so that they experience at least small tiny change.

Don’t lose focus on others, they are already the main character in their lives, it’s time for you.

Remember, change is the only thing promised.

With love, M.❤️

HELPING

This text is quite an emotional rollercoaster but if you keep following it, it will take you to a beautiful place. I wish it leaves you - at least at the end - splashed with gratitude and new direction of awareness. Today I was on a bus station where so many life stories cross into one big node full of different people, romance, hardly said goodbyes and solo travellers that want to see more of the world. I find so fascinating what these places can do. You can meet the whole world represented by people on one point, it’s a magical place (i’m acknowledging, however, those who have anxiety from travelling, sending power and courage to go despite of how you feel). When I sit in a café on these places and do my usual people watch session (amazing activity), I see so many joyful faces that meet their loved ones. I smile.

There are, however, stories from other side. Stories, that make me feel sad, priviledged, and leave me with mixed emotions. All people that are running away from their country, compeletely alone, sometimes don’t speak the language, no one understands them and unless they can figure things out from context, they’re stuck to translator in their phones, surviving. Or mother saying goodbye to her son, because he needs to go fight for his country and she isn’t really sure whether it’s not the last time she is hugging him. Things i saw today set me up for a good hour of crying. Maybe I’m too sensitive, but it’s different when you see it in real life. I believe we need to develop a certain ignorance about all the things that are happening otherwise we would be all in tears constantly. These emotions can be, especially for hyper empathic people, confusing - you want to help or be there for them as someone that lifts them up, but you’re dragged down from the feelings they have, because it’s very easy to put yourself in shoes of others. Lot of times I didn’t know how to deal with these types of feelings and emotions. It usually got only worse when I tried “not to think about it” - to surpress them - my intrusive thoughts would get pretty wild….I needed to paint a big fat red cross on all of them (this is not a metaphor) because i didn’t know how to stop them, if you are someone who experieces that, know that you are not alone. And also, If you are the person who would love to be saviour of all, I have a very obvious reality check for you - this is quite challenging goal to accomplish and you would need to devote your whole life only this one thing. Which, i mean - feel free, it is a very noble move! however for more of a “I have a family to feed and dreams to chase” type of people, I have this solution. Try to change your trajectory of focus - from despair and feeling sorry for somebody (very weak position) - into way stronger state of being honest gratitude - not gratitude for the things that are happening, but for the things YOU happen to have. But…gratitude? In such a situation? Isn’t that compeletely selfish?…Maybe! But aren’t you feeling way stronger when you are in a state of gratitude for the things you have? Aren’t you feeling way more abundant, and therefore, ready to give others? Whereas if you compare it with the feeling of total despair. Without further explanation It might seem even enadequate to force oneself to feel grateful, but you need to put yourself in a position where you are able to deal with other sad emotions. And remember another very self-explanatory fact - you can only give, what you have. And if you’re taking and developing for too long the dispear from those who suffer, you’ll only have more dispear to offer. It’s very natural to feel the sadness and show empathy, it’s needed! However, what I am saying is - don’t drown in it. You are in priviledged place of a lifeguard who has his feet on dry floor, by pulling the one who’s in need (financially, emotionally..) you need to make sure you stand still on your feet and have established a good base of gratitude . Only after can you give hand to those drowning. What this reminds me of? If you’re not currently thinking about the “put your oxygen mask first before helping others” you should probably book a flight. If you find the strength in yourself and remind yourself of what you have, then you are ready to give the help to others in need. Only the fact that you can read this text in peace is such a blessing others weren’t given. You can see colours with your beautiful eyes, you have so many things others would give so much to have. There are many things about this world that don’t make sense, but there are so many things that clearly have its meaning. So focus on things you understand so that you can navigate easier through the moments where your emotions are mixed but you still want to be of service to others. With this said, I believe we are touching the finish line. I hope you will from time to time give your change to the people who need it once you leave the supermarket, i hope you will remind yourself from time to time that having a roof over your head, food in the fridge and someone you can hug is at the end of day, the greatest wealth. And that feeling gratitude for the things you have before you help others, isn’t selfish act, it is the necessary one.

With love

Meda ❤️

ABUNDANCE

How to cure the sense of lack?

First of all, we are always abundant in any phase of life we currently find ourselves in. How is that possible, that you can feel the same feeling or even greater feeling of abundance than the person that can afford a better car? Well, It’s only thought away. If you, for example can’t afford that car you think you need and you simply accept it (but really really accept it - not thinking jealous thoughts after you cross the street and see the first Mercedes) and focus on things you either can afford or that you already have and be grateful for them, there is an enormous sense of freedom, you’re freeing yourself from the cage of your own expectations.

Alright - now you accepted you can’t afford it. Don’t get it wrong tho - we are still absolutely getting that new car. You just gotta remain in that state of abundance, gratitude and add the secret magic ingredient - faith (of course lot of work, patience and discipline! We’re not talking delusions here, we’re talking the combination of delusions with discipline - that’s the unbeatable combo). You maybe can’t afford it now but instead of feeling sorry for yourself, sit down and create an idea/plan on how to get that car. We’re not making a tutorial on how to lose your precious ambitions. You can’t have only what you believe you can’t have. So keep your ambitious and just use that secret ingredient. Become faithful, believe everyday so much as if the car was already parked in front of our home (by the way - have you already thanked for your home today?). Believe that in any situation we find ourselves in, there will always be something we can’t afford - you are absolutely not alone. Even those highest 1 % income individuals have to face the fact, that they simply can’t afford to buy TOP 100 companies at once - yes it is very priviledged “problem” but isn’t “not being able to afford a new car” priviledged to some extent too?

See, what I really want you to take from this reading time is one thing - it’s never the matter, it’s always the approach, therefore - it’s always you. You are making the problems. You are choosing to feel like victim in the world of abundance. But what’s amazing, you can be the one who chooses the faithful, calm approach when solving problems. You can switch your approach from the place of lack to a place where there’s so much faith, wealth, love and kindness that you’ll just need to share it with others. And those who understood how life works, they know when there’s something they can’t afford, they switch their focus to their abundance, to the things they already have, show gratitude, still that doesn’t mean they gave up. The opposite is actually the true. They just know that with calm, focused and steady mindset while maintaining their feeling of abundance , there’s nothing they can’t get.

Also, remember to spread and share your gratitude to others. And don’t forget to thank for daily little things. It can be so tiny - I mean that we take for granted. Like the fact that we have running water. Public schools with full libraries - you can become a future innovator, for free… Smile from the lady in supermarket, the fact you could buy yourself food and at the same time not be afraid whether someone is pointing gun at you. Yes, it could feel disturbing now, but we need to face these harsh images to truly realize that we are living in such a blessed and abundant state. I do also catch myself having some “priviledged” problems and that’s always when I know I should focus on these “tiny” gifts. Because only then I am ready to recieve more.

Broaden your perspective, say thank you for the first thing you can think of, receive and share smiles, give away love and kindness, don’t be attached to the materialistic things, rather go hug your family member, yet work hard (smart) and be a little delusional. And this is how you cure rhe sense of lack.

I love you, M.

FEEDBACK

About life constantly giving us feedback on how we’re currently doing. Because it’s always us. We just tend to understand these “feedbacks” as bad luck or unfairness. We’ll discuss a bit of laziness too.

I just want to let you know with all respect and love, these are my thoughts and it’s all my opinion - and I had many of them. But I feel like this one is the closest to truth so far. Get curious. Make a coffee & let’s go. It’s worth all the way.

What makes me sad is seeing people with dead awareness going through life and complaining about what happened to them and not realising that everything from the external world is a reflection of themselves and their actions. No one likes you in school? Have you ever smiled on someone? Are YOU the kind one? You have constant pain in your joints? Did you look for some free Youtube videos on pain relief instead of eating sugar cakes that cause inflammation and will hardly help you in solving such a vital problem. You have anxiety? Have you seek out help? Or are you just saying you have anxiety so that the world would just accept you as you are - Yes this applies even for something so sensitive and delicate as anxiety. Remember, that life rewards those who are willing to get better, to seek help, to cooperate, to give - and mainly that are AWARE. That’s why I’m writing this. I wish these words will leave you with awareness that there is more to what’s happening in your life and give you the opportunity to realise that.

Let’s look at ourselves in the mirror. Do we seem ourselves as we really are, do we seem our actions as they really are? Or do we perhaps use our own pink glasses, use a little creativity and come up with sophisticated excuse, because it is sometimes the easiest way how to explain, to digest, to accept any kind of situation or any kind of result caused by ourselves. But why do we do this? Why does it literally hurt when we admit, that we f*cked up?

When we admit something and feel shame - It’s called emotional pain or suffering and it’s a real thing - when we experience sadness, anger, anxiety, shame or any other negative emotions, it can hurt as much as physical pain - and who wants to hurt himself like that when he could simply avoid it (source: verywellmind.com). What’s more though, we don’t find creative explanation to avoid this pain just in front of others - we sometimes do it also in front ourselves - even when no one else is listening.

The real reason why we didn’t do the homework? I feel like In case of homework you’re not really charged if you don’t execute - from the moment we were given a homework until the moment when we need to hand it in, we kinda play an acting game with ourselves and with others. Why? Because if we really don’t want to jump into our rational and mature self and just do it, there is probably no threat that would be alarming enough to us and woke up the mature version (such as fee if you don’t hand in your tax declaration - here you don’t want to do it neither, but there is the “motivation”) and silenced our lazy, confused self - but what would it mean? We would need to do the thing, we would need to be disciplined. Therefore in case when nothing really threatens us (like note from a teacher that we forgot homework? cute… easy pass…). And so we start to play this game of “simple ignorant” that is very aware of his duty, yet does a great job to blurry its sharpness. And we start to look at the external factor that “decided” for us the result where we didn’t do much (”no time, so many other homework, personal reasons, my cat ate it”). Everything done with our pink rose glasses on. But what are we actually doing is lying to ourselves and starting to “train” this victimhood/lazy muscle*. Not that there would be everyone like this, but be honest - and now with no pink glasses on - have you always been honest about your actions when something didn’t work out? Look - I know that in this world, honest people have it….let’s say… more difficult than people that are brilliant in excuses - to anybody else, tell actually what you find sociably most favourable for you - what’s actually the most important to assure that you’re not deluding yourself, the person who you should have the most honest relationship with. So as i mentioned “train” the victimhood muscle, it is very much meant as any other habit - usually and most of the time we find ourselves in the situation where we have 2 choices - to take the ownership (and take the hard way) or the second one - to stay in victim mindset (and have it easy for the moment) I just wish for us to choose the harder and more rewarding way. I know we don’t have to look too long for reasons to choose the second approach and say that there was just too much stress, too many negative people around, too much noice. However, by leaning on this side of explanation, we just stretch the distance between us and the person that we want to become. And that’s actually the definition of success = the distance between you and the place you want to be is hidden in your actions. I have a question - Is there someone more important in OUR OWN LIFES, than us? There is no one in your life that would be more “main character” than YOU. Therefore decide, if you want to sweet talk yourself, be comfortable but in fact digging into the ground or if you are ready to face the real truth and climb like net worth of Warren Buffet.

Why an example of homework? Let me explain one metaphor.

Not doing the homework by itself isn’t a big deal. But what’s the side effect of not doing it? So many things that are actually way more important than that one damn homework itself. What’s that?

You teach yourself that you don’t need to do the small things that are part of a way greater mission. You’re not graduating from homework. You’re graduating from a journey of 3 and more years. And this detail such as homework play its role in it.

You teach yourself that you don’t need to respect deadlines.

And this is a recipe for failure. Let’s compare it with something you wish to do and be paid for - the career of a speaker for example. Let’s say you want to be a #1 world speaker, that is successful beyond your imagination. You want to speak at big conferences filled by millionaires that came there to see you. In order to get there, you need to take daily small actions like reading lots of books, attending workshops for speakers…These small actions have the same characteristics just like that homework. The one who gives you the homework is teacher. The one who gives you your dream is life. And let’s admit - Life is a teacher. Is there a deadline? Certainly. We just might not realise that everyday because it seems like something we don’t understand, we might be afraid of it. Do you see the similarities? DEADline. Once you cross your DEAD line there is no way back. And it’s very important to accept this, give it a certain importance and realise you’re not here forever. If you’ll always keep postponing reading the book on “how to become the greatest speaker in the world” and go partying instead, don’t be surprised you won’t get any better in speaking - and now the role of feedback starts to play. Once you realise the fact that sugarcoating and bending the reality will only harm you in this way, there is going to happen a slight shift in your understanding. You will start to seem all these failures, adversities and low times as blessings, as mentors, as the feedback that will give you the gift of information. What kind of information? “NOT THIS WAY”. Looking for a treasure in a forest and taking the route that will lead to haunted house (let’s suppose the treasure is not hidden inside ok), will not be the way. So you need to change direction. You see no other way? Create one - and if you really want it, you will create it even if it had to be barefoot by your hands only. With sitting with yourself in silence, writing your wishes down and believing, that one day you’ll have everything IF you are willing to create one path for yourself if circumstances require that, you can’t lose.

Everything suddenly becomes feedback. The back pain, the migraine, the graduation, the great relationships. If you’re broke, struggle to afford new clothes, look at your life, look at your actions and the mindset you walk with in the world. The fourth place in the competition you really thought you’ll win is simply a feedback to work maybe smarter instead of harder. Once you adopt the mindset that no feedback is negative (because how can be something negative when it literally gives you an advice) then you’re halfway there. It takes many days and many moments of being aware, at first you need to force yourself in it, but remember it’s just a habit too. Everything that you do repeatedly is just a habit - complaining is just a habit, eating desert after every meal is just a habit, screaming when triggered - just a habit (that need a psycholog on top of that).

Life is a game. Play it like you know the rules. And if it’s game over because of that damn third section of a game just where is the hidden abbys that you always forget about.. well… If you really want to win, you will take it as a feedback to “be more aware” and you’ll try so long until the game won’t celebrate you with words CONGRATULATIONS! YOU MADE IT!

*It’s important to mention that laziness can be sometimes more productive than hardworking or that laziness tells us that what we’re doing isn’t right for us, but for this topic I recommend to read the first article called “WHY”.

BEGINNINGS

There are two groups of people:

1) Those who love beginnings, new chapters of their life

2) Those who become deeply anxious when it comes to any change - and with this, upcoming uncertainty.

This text is for the second group. Therefore also for me. I’ll be talking on resistance to begginings, acceptance to “being seen while failing” and how to get rid of mind blocks that are stealing the life. I’ll show it on one of my personal beginnings.

My type of beginning was starting to dance in my 20’s.

There are some of us who are too resistant to “be a beginner” in anything. We don’t like to be seen how we are trying, but, we rather keep playing it safe at cost of the true experience of life.

I was just the same. My ego was too loud to be silenced by my soul that always knew, what I wanted. I got shaped by a society that was very competitive and judgemental. I felt like everything I was doing had to be already great from the start because I couldn’t bear the feeling of being seen, being on eyes of someone and give them the opportunity to judge me and have a bad (”bad”) image of me. So I don’t have to explain twice that the feeling of being on eyes + FAILING was completely unbearable for me. Therefore I leaned intensively to more ordinary activities, like school or something. But still - there was this desire that I just couldn’t get rid of, even though I really tried to apply so many excuses. And my excuses were great! So creative! Yet I still found myself watching dance battles, random dance videos, choreographies and admired each one of those dancers. Then I started to imagine myself dancing - I mean like a professional, precise moves and everything - it was a performance I was sad that only I was able to see 😃…First it was very weird experience, but I just couldn’t help myself - even tho I still served so many reasons why dancing is just not for me. I thought it’s already too late, any dancer I was speaking to have already danced “at least 5 or 6 years” and now I would be here, worse than kids? Nonono. Impossible. Stupid. DECLINED.

Still one day this voice in my head was so loud and so I agreed with myself (very much passive agressively “agreed” because there was still ego in the driving seat) that I will just book a dance class.

And how it went? I was glad that I took the action but the feeling of shame and being new was daunting. The teacher was great, the people were exactly how I saw them in the dance battles, joyful, laughing, encouraging. But was it helpful when I blocked all this good energy with my doubts, judgement and overthinking?

And so I again came to the root cause. Me. Then I realised I could say that I grew up in this judgemental environment, this and that….but the fact that I would let it shape my way of thinking was on me. So I realised that any of the beginnings we want to start, we need to FIRST begin with ourselves. Because there is no chance you can start something new as your old self. And what this means? A LOT of inner work. Especially for those people that are judging others and therefore are judgemental themselves. And if you feel attacked right now, good. Finish this text you already started reading. I was exacltly like this. Attacked and resistant. And if you’re triggered, know that it is your opportunity to adjust some of your approaches to life and consequently make it greater.

Would you rather stay in the same line or experience more of life? Let’s stop acting like playing it safe will give us something. This might not be for everyone, but you have been warned - these are “WORDS FOR PEOPLE WHO GET IT”. Playing it safe and not being exposed to new experience will give you the sense of safety, but be aware that nothing is really granted. Nor safety. If you rationalise everything by putting “safety” on a table (meaning also emotional safety - like not being vulnerable), you’re also being delusional. You can feel safe, but that doesn’t change the reality where such a thing as “safety” is never granted 100 %. If we just realised that the only thing that is granted is change, we could probably be less resistant to this phenomen. Plus, with being more welcoming to change - you could sense the true essence, flow of life - because that’s what change is - the way, the true essence of life. And when something changes, well, we can’t avoid some kind of beginning. Beginnings are usually hard, but passing by another 20 years of your precious life and realising, you are on the same place as you were is harder pill to swallow. Realise that this life is a true gift and what we do with our gifts? We better use it to our best advantage. There is chance 1 in 400 trillion that you are born. And you are here, scared of change? scared of others’ opinions? It is very natural and normal to experience these feelings, don’t get me wrong! What is not normal, or at least shouldn’t be, that these feelings will diminish your confidence or erase your hunger for life. The fact that you are here is an incredible miracle. So with all my respect to you, start acting like it. Book that class, send that text message, start the company, say “hi” first, take risks, make changes, get out of your head, impress yourself so that life can impress you back.

All my love to you ❤️ Meda

WHY

because I was done.

with not beginning the one year old project that was calling me everyday.

with not having patience because I was scared of failure and didn’t see results immediately.

with questioning myself daily on how to love what I was told to do.

with daily commands from people with smaller mediocre minds (if you get it you get it).

with putting myself down through self-sabotage, million doubts and almost accepting this was the way I was.

with the need to be perfect.

with watching other people and forgetting about myself.

with pleasing people that weren’t worth of what I gave them.

with treating myself so poorly my body and brain developed self-harming habits as a way to make me realize I was on really bad place.

with talking to people that were thinking so ordinarily. that were so serious. so important. so ready to let down every excitement expressed.

with not waking up and be excited about my day.

with having to put on many masks so that others would accept me.

with being exhausted from hyper-focusing on others’ behaviour so that I would analyse whether my mask works or not.

with feeling like a butterfly but in a cocoon made of my self-conciousness and fear. And I wasn’t able to break it.

with mediocrity.

with the sentence “This is just the way I am…”

with being overly sensitive to the point I was crying almost daily in my job.

with not having conversations about emotions, inspiration, self-improvement.

with listening to hypocritical conversations, making fun of others, dealing with children in the body of an adult.

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Once I realised my “why” has more than 15 answers, I knew there was no way of going back. I am convinced there is somewhere the space where people are encouraging each other, are kind, uplifting, inspiring, getting inspired, celebrating others and that these people realise - hating, laughing at others and gossiping is the most expensive waste of one’s time. Why am I convinced? You’re just reading words in this space. The space that will flourish with encouragement and belief in you, in me, in us.

& Why do I need to share it - I’m doing this for another “me” who may be currently in place that doesn’t feel right anymore, and needs a little support to get out of there or just find some strength. For another “me” who loves conversations about universe yet gets bitter conversation about how they are fed up with this weather, with this person, this meal, this colour of his shirt, this salary, this political system, this Monday, this hairdresser, this coffee…this…that…them…and. then. all. again. But mainly I am doing this to create a bubble of inspiration, of encouragement and whenever you feel like losing it (everyone does, every single one of us and it’s okay) - you may find encouraging words in this space that will remind you of your real power.

Excercise:

I encourage you to stop your whole life for 15 minutes and ask yourself - Why? Apply it on anything that might not be clear for you in your current life - your career, a certain friendship, accounts that you’re following, being in a relationship that you are in right now, or why aren’t you in relationship - you get the idea.

Do you like finances? Remember that minutes dedicated to reflecting aren't spent - they are invested. And how is that formula?…The more you invest, the more you’ll get in future? - but still, keep the balance ;)

You have more than 15 minutes? I mean - you want to invest more? Okay, read closely - there is this method of 5 WHYs - this is originally developed by one Japanese engineer and first was applied in Toyota Motor Corporation as to determine the root-cause of a defect or any problem in vehicle. However, we tried this method with my friend when we were discussing emotions that were harder to explain. And it’s way deeper than you might think it is…after the 4th “why” we were already discussing our childhood, the environment which we grew up in, that shaped us, and there was still one more “why”... Give it a go - be ready though, to get the quality answer, you need to provide the quality focus and effort. Don’t neglect on yourself in this, it is worth more than all the “get your life together workshops”. All you need is YOURSELF and some time.

Write out your answers and keep them - oh what an opportunity for you to ask - Why?

My texts are on how to get closer to the version of yourself, that will answer with authenticity and not with fear. That will answer from the place of calmness and not with anxiety of what will be. That will answer with soul and not with ego. After some time (and work) you will get to compare these answers. And you might be pleasantly surprised.

That’s everything I have to tell you today.

Remember, for any questions or requests, you can send me a message from any of the platforms you see below this text.

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With love, Meda.