FAMILIARTIY

You feel it on places where you know you’ll find the cup for your tea, your old books, your old notes, photos. It is the feeling of total safety and comfort. It doesn’t have to be a physical space though. It is the dialect you hear. Your native language when you are in the middle of different country. It reminds you of your childhood when there was so many things unknown to you and your world was so small and everything had its place. Even if you experienced danger or abuse as a child, you feel weirdly comfortable with it, because it reminds you of your childhood and quite strangely your brain craves it. Brain craves anything that would strip it of unnecessary analyzing caused by uncertainty - simply stuff you haven’t experienced yet. It’s the pure nature of brain and our instincts. Brain seeks comfort, safety, faces we know, our parents. You remember how great, calm, you feel when you come to your city where you were born or if you don’t have good memories from the city you were born, think of a place from your childhood that you felt so good, so welcomed, maybe it was your friend’s house, maybe it was at your grandma’s, maybe it was a specific place of a vacation you remember so clearly; maybe it isn’t a place but a certain language - when you hear it, you think of the times when you were with less responsabilities, it gives you the sense of nostalgia. The feeling of „finally I can let go now“.

It’s good to be reminded of these feelings, places, people, sounds. But, paradoxically, it starts to be dangerous (for your success) if you indulge in this feeling for too long and you get attached to certain people, places or feelings. Being attached emotionally to anything so much it makes very hard to leave or it makes you even stay forever, that is a killer of your potential. This familiarity, no matter how great, calming, serene, safe it feels could be damaging. We don’t choose where we are born but we can choose where we spend our last days. I wish for everyone let it not be the same place that you were born in, if you feel that your potential is not realised there. It hurts to leave, to not hug your loved ones for a long time, to feel alone lot of times. But doesn’t it hurt to know you could go somewhere, try something new, try the possibilities of life and not actually doing it? The question of what it would be like are in your head for a reason. When you grow up in a certain place, there are certain faces with certain experiences, and based on these experiences they advice you on your life. And you have to listen…otherwise you wouldn’t “survive”. Then you have certain “name”, you might be known for something (like being the best in language classes or the worst in math or a dancer or painter, writer, whatever) and no matter how much you wanna fight against these „labels“, by constant repeating, your subconscious mind grabs something. And believe it or not, this might greatly influence the whole perception of yourself. Perception that others gave you. And if you stay in this space, you might really become it. And once you become others’ idea, you’re living for someone else. Also you can feel certain expectations projected on you and if you are a person who is measuring his worth on the things you produce, your marks, your diplomas, you are in a trap.

But realise, this is only one little bubble you experience in this whole world. Can you imagine how many different realities are out there? Can you imagine what advices, what feedback others would give you in different parts of the world? What kind of approach they have somewhere else that you could find inspiring? And can you imagine a new circle of people that have no expectations of you? In situations like this, there is another version that will add on to the “complete you”. That will show you your more and more authentic self, just like a new child born in this world, you are a new person in new environment. This is the magic of travelling. Unfamiliarity, uncenrtainty, taking risks, calculated, not calculated, living as rich life as you possibly can. Will the feeling of familiarity and safety win and will you be okay with the question „What if I actually did that“? You choose. But choose wisely.

At the end, the greatest risk of success is taking no risk.

Take care ❤️