WHY

because I was done.

with not beginning the one year old project that was calling me everyday.

with not having patience because I was scared of failure and didn’t see results immediately.

with questioning myself daily on how to love what I was told to do.

with daily commands from people with smaller mediocre minds (if you get it you get it).

with putting myself down through self-sabotage, million doubts and almost accepting this was the way I was.

with the need to be perfect.

with watching other people and forgetting about myself.

with pleasing people that weren’t worth of what I gave them.

with treating myself so poorly my body and brain developed self-harming habits as a way to make me realize I was on really bad place.

with talking to people that were thinking so ordinarily. that were so serious. so important. so ready to let down every excitement expressed.

with not waking up and be excited about my day.

with having to put on many masks so that others would accept me.

with being exhausted from hyper-focusing on others’ behaviour so that I would analyse whether my mask works or not.

with feeling like a butterfly but in a cocoon made of my self-conciousness and fear. And I wasn’t able to break it.

with mediocrity.

with the sentence “This is just the way I am…”

with being overly sensitive to the point I was crying almost daily in my job.

with not having conversations about emotions, inspiration, self-improvement.

with listening to hypocritical conversations, making fun of others, dealing with children in the body of an adult.

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Once I realised my “why” has more than 15 answers, I knew there was no way of going back. I am convinced there is somewhere the space where people are encouraging each other, are kind, uplifting, inspiring, getting inspired, celebrating others and that these people realise - hating, laughing at others and gossiping is the most expensive waste of one’s time. Why am I convinced? You’re just reading words in this space. The space that will flourish with encouragement and belief in you, in me, in us.

& Why do I need to share it - I’m doing this for another “me” who may be currently in place that doesn’t feel right anymore, and needs a little support to get out of there or just find some strength. For another “me” who loves conversations about universe yet gets bitter conversation about how they are fed up with this weather, with this person, this meal, this colour of his shirt, this salary, this political system, this Monday, this hairdresser, this coffee…this…that…them…and. then. all. again. But mainly I am doing this to create a bubble of inspiration, of encouragement and whenever you feel like losing it (everyone does, every single one of us and it’s okay) - you may find encouraging words in this space that will remind you of your real power.

Excercise:

I encourage you to stop your whole life for 15 minutes and ask yourself - Why? Apply it on anything that might not be clear for you in your current life - your career, a certain friendship, accounts that you’re following, being in a relationship that you are in right now, or why aren’t you in relationship - you get the idea.

Do you like finances? Remember that minutes dedicated to reflecting aren't spent - they are invested. And how is that formula?…The more you invest, the more you’ll get in future? - but still, keep the balance ;)

You have more than 15 minutes? I mean - you want to invest more? Okay, read closely - there is this method of 5 WHYs - this is originally developed by one Japanese engineer and first was applied in Toyota Motor Corporation as to determine the root-cause of a defect or any problem in vehicle. However, we tried this method with my friend when we were discussing emotions that were harder to explain. And it’s way deeper than you might think it is…after the 4th “why” we were already discussing our childhood, the environment which we grew up in, that shaped us, and there was still one more “why”... Give it a go - be ready though, to get the quality answer, you need to provide the quality focus and effort. Don’t neglect on yourself in this, it is worth more than all the “get your life together workshops”. All you need is YOURSELF and some time.

Write out your answers and keep them - oh what an opportunity for you to ask - Why?

My texts are on how to get closer to the version of yourself, that will answer with authenticity and not with fear. That will answer from the place of calmness and not with anxiety of what will be. That will answer with soul and not with ego. After some time (and work) you will get to compare these answers. And you might be pleasantly surprised.

That’s everything I have to tell you today.

Remember, for any questions or requests, you can send me a message from any of the platforms you see below this text.

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With love, Meda.