CHANGE

Because it is the only thing that is inevitable and guaranteed. Guaranteed like nothing else in this world.

Because we shouldn’t avoid it - on the contrary - let’s welcome it with excitement and hope. Hope for better days, for better us.

How you were yesterday will never repeat again. How you will be tomorrow will show up only those 24 hours. There is never a same moment twice. There is never the identical person same two days in a row even tho, his birth certificate nubmer is still the same. Change is the only constant in our lives, yet we are so avoidant to it. Why?

As a very self conscious child with hyper-focus on others’ subtle changes in their face expressions that would signal negative emotions, I tended to avoid all conversations about myself and my worth, therefore also about the fact if I changed - because I believed that the sentence “You changed” was never a compliment. This sentence always felt like an obligation to start my Powerpoint Presentation on the topic “10 reasons why I changed”. It felt like moment that required explanation. It was always about the perception of others - what they think about me. So I thought. In the actual fact it was “What I think they think about me”. With time, observing myself, my loved ones, acquaintances, I realised that If it was me, who is telling others “You changed” - only thing i got from this kind of thinking was

• doubts, because you automatically start to compare yourself to others if you think about them in a way that isn’t loving,

• you loose focus from yourself, because you are being distracted by other person that has usually nothing to do with your own life, and at the end of all this?

• You just wasted time.

And then I realised. All these people with comments on you “Oh you changed.”, “I thought you were going to be this and that” they are really just robbing themselves. They needed to take their time to analyse you. Giving YOU their attention. Instead they could put this “investigation” somewhere on more productive place. Now don’t confuse this type of thought process with honest wishing the best for someone. Celebrating others - that’s something everyone should do with knowing the same will come back to him.

Let’s develop the “need to explain” part, that is for most really daunting.

The art of hearing out someone saying how you changed, looking them in the eyes, smiling and just moving on, minding your own business with no thought residue of their opinion, is a skill that can be acquired. Who will teach us? Let’s look at someone that has never said a word. Still, after a time, everyone suddenly understood what’s going on and she (it’s her I’m convinced) is one of the most respected things on this planet.

Nature. Constant changes, no explanations. There is something beautiful about doing your own thing and not explaining yourself. The reason we sometimes avoid it is lack of faith. Because change means unknown, uncertainty, new field. We hate not knowing. Those who lack faith will never get to the point of dealing or rather “easing in” into the uncertainty. But as elevated value faith is, such elevated results can be expected. If you believe enough.

So do your own thing and take some risks. You’re here for a very short period of time even tho it might not feel like it right now. Know right the rules. Those who understand that change has to be embraced, not dimmed will have the world on the silver plate. Those who don’t are making the plates for you. It might sound harsh but that’s the world. Still, give everyone chance to understand this. Stay open, everyone deserves chance to change. And if you notice someone changing, show support, they might need it. And to those who won’t change, the only presentation you might deliver now is “Why I change and why you should not care”- and make it in Keynote so that they experience at least small tiny change.

Don’t lose focus on others, they are already the main character in their lives, it’s time for you.

Remember, change is the only thing promised.

With love, M.❤️